CHRISTIAN POLLUTION NEWSLETTER

Hello, Christian Pollution Warriors!

Updated on
Hello, Christian Pollution Warriors!

Thank you for subscribing to Christian Pollution.

Terry Trueman and I waited to send this introduction letter since delivering it to a handful of people seemed pointless. Now, beyond a hundred subscribers, we want to introduce ourselves and tell you a little about us and the goals of Christian Pollution.

Terry Trueman is a simple man with simple pleasures, like scotch or bourbon, I can’t remember which, who, if you get drunk enough, will tell you how he invented things like the Ronco Record cleaner for which he never received a dime.

Terry Trueman Holding the Ronco Record Cleaner

Yes, a simple man who somehow once wrote a book so existentially challenging that an entire school board fought to keep his masterpiece from children’s eyes. Despite his yarn spinning and simpleness, he poeticizes with complexity so powerful it evokes reader laziness, forming a tragedy of ignorance, unknown since Apollo cursed Cassandra.

Armed with a glass of scotch or bourbon in one hand, Trueman wields the keyboard with the other, clicking away at the Christians, not because he hates them but because he despises the evangelical Trumpers and their liberal brethren, who stand idle as the fascists usurp power.

Terry Trueman Kicks Trump Into Pit

Then there is I, Vincent V. Triola , a man who made his living selling bullshit academic papers, content marketing, and website development.

Writing and Drinking

During those days of hack writing, wisdom flourished with each swallow of vodka and keyboard’s strike, bringing awareness of the great, loathsome Christian scourge as the cause of so many social issues. I might have come to realize their evil sooner had I not drank so much; still, the understanding arrived and rose arms against the goliath in the writing of books so meaningful that no publisher dared to print them despite my career as a professional writer. I, like Trueman, also fight with poetry so sublime that audiences are deaf to its significance.

Today, I thrust the Spear of Longinus at American Christians for having forsaken their ethics and given themselves to the new idolatry: Trump.

The Spear of Longinus

Undaunted, Trueman and I formed the Christian Pollution because two losers are better than one. Now, you, the One-hundred-six Christian Pollution Warriors, stand with us at Thermopylae to repel the Evangelical Horde. Will we win? Perhaps not, but we’ll go down swinging!

Welcome to the Christian Pollution!

FYI

  • Christian Pollution has both serious and humorous articles, and we encourage you to read both as well as poetry to make you a fine well-rounded warrior against Christian terrorists.
  • You will find all future and past newsletters posted under the tag Newsletter from now on. Bookmark it, dammit!
  • To see the latest stories, you can go to the front page, and if seeking older articles, visit our archive.
  • To take part in the war with Christians, please join our newsletter (it's free!).
Pastor Christian T. Roll
  • We should also mention because we are not biased, Pastor Christian T. Roll is the voice of opposition to Christian Pollution.
  • I suppose you should follow him also in the spirit of fairness. If you are not already a member of the Christian Pollution,
  • Follow and Subscribe to Christian Pollution.

 

Uncles Sam says, We want you!
Back to - No To Christianity
Newsletters
Vincent Triola