Last night I dreamt another goodbye to Stephanie
Stephanie was a friend, a respected teen-services librarian in Rochester, NY who started a teen book festival there and who told me that my novel Stuck in Neutral was her favorite book. We became close friends.
Added note; I just now noticed that today, March 1st, is the anniversary of Stephanie’s death (March 1, 2018). I hadn’t been aware of this during my dream about her last night, or when I recycled this poem today.
Stephanie
And I went back Many years With a wide range Of affection And intimacy, Closeness for a time then later, distance.
And when She killed herself I was shocked and hurt.
Lots of people Are saying lovely things About her.
When you reach the end Of a book It states “The end” And you knew this was coming And where and when. And you’re ready And you close the cover.
That is one thing,
After all, We all have to leave Sometime.
Stephanie’s You Tube Pictorial on her obituary online Runs 23 minutes And no photo Is up for longer than A few seconds. Her life is presented As one Rich in love, family, Friendship and purpose.
Stephanie didn’t say Goodbye, At least not to me, But I’m quite sure I won’t be seeing her again. There is no heaven where our ego-selves end up if we’ve been well behaved, nor any hell for all eternity if we’ve been naughty.
So, goodbye Stephanie I hope you got what You wanted in the end.
But I doubt it.